Congratulations to the 2069 Weaver League Champions, the Panama City Locks!
Dominant starting pitching is the great equalizer in baseball. With defense controlling play from the start, an elite pitcher can neuter the most potent offensive lineups with ease by dictating a game’s flow through pitch placement and changing speeds. Baseball history is replete with great righty-lefty pairs: Spahn and Sain, Koufax and Drysdale, Maddux and Glavine, Johnson and Schilling… and after the 2069 Weaver Series, Panama City’s duo of RHP Smokey Joe Williams and LHP Frank Tanana can forever be linked with that prestigious class.
While most pundits focused their attention on Williams and Tanana, Panama City’s pitching staff posted a collective 2.40 ERA in 2069 (best: 2.39), good for 58th best all-time as a team. At the plate, no spot in the lineup could be considered an “easy out” as nine batters posted double-digit home run totals. Late-season pickup SS Nico Rinderknecht led the way with 32 HR (.273/32/81), while LF Frank Barlow provided critical lineup protection in the power slots (.282/26/93). On the basepaths, CF Charlie Hatcher (42) and 3B Harris Tovar (44) also embraced the “dynamic duo” theme by stealing 86 bases to help setup run-scoring opportunities.
After a 1-season hiatus, Panama City and Sapporo fans embraced the chance to build on the teams’ budding ILCS rivalry. In 2067, Sapporo had made short work of the Locks, knocking them out of the ILCS in 5 games. After a 4-3 home win in Game 1 over RHP Smokey Joe Williams, Snow Monkeys fans were confident that history was set to repeat. LHP Frank Tanana, on the other hand, had other ideas. After logging 7 scoreless innings in Game 2 to help lead the Locks to a 3-0 win, Tanana repeated his performance in a pivotal Game 5 with 7.2 scoreless innings to give Panama City the 3-2 series lead. The Locks had 2 chances to claim the IL pennant on the road in Sapporo, but LHP Red Stovey, the season’s jack-of-all-trades, cemented the series with a win in Game 6.
Heading into the Weaver Series, Panama City was almost an afterthought as most media coverage focused on the Stockholm Swedes’ inevitable reboot of their dominant 40s/50s dynasty. Were the Locks destined to be a forgettable “bad guy” for Sweden’s heroes to pummel into submission? Irritated by the comparison, Williams and Tanana worked with Locks equipment managers to paint their mitts in a Thanos-themed color scheme. Social media lit up with pictures of homemade replicas, and after the two logged road wins to open the Weaver Series, fans everywhere started to wonder: is Panama City winning the Weaver Cup the true inevitable end for the Finals? Stockholm eked out a Game 3 1-0 win in 13 innings, but the Swedes’ 1-0 loss in Game 4 put them right back on the brink of elimination.
At that point, Locks players could credibly be accused of letting their foot up off the gas. Stockholm won Games 5 and 6 by a collective score of 13-3, setting up a dramatic Game 7 at Stockholm’s Cruz Field. Throngs of Swedes fans packed Gamla Stan, Stockholm’s historic core, and were ready to celebrate their team’s potential comeback from a 3-1 deficit. Chants of “3-1 lead! 3-1 lead!” rang throughout the square before first pitch, but they got noticeably quieter after Panama City kicked off scoring with runs in both the 1st and 3rd innings. LHP Frank Tanana had marked each of Panama City’s 3 prior wins by crossing out a colored “infinity stone” with a Sharpie, and his focused glare on the mound revealed he was ready to blackout the 4th stone. Tanana pitched 7.1 innings, but with only 4 batters getting hits, the 2-1 lead established early looked to be enough. In the top of the 6th inning, SS Nico Rinderknecht wiped away all doubt by clubbing a 2-run homer deep into LF, and as Rinderknecht trotted around the bases, an eerie quiet enveloped the stadium and would remain until the final out.
Upon returning home to Panama City, Locks players were feted by a unique “canalside” parade. Instead of jubilant crowds lining downtown streets, fans from all across Panama converged on the Canal Zone and turned the 40-mile industrial shipping channel into a rollicking countrywide fiesta. Powered by adrenaline and perhaps a bit of liquid courage, Locks players started repeating their locker room mantra from the regular season: “Why not us, why not now?” In response, the fans chanted back a phrase that might be the Locks’ locker room catchphrase for the coming 2070 season: “Why not MORE?” Congrats again Panama City!
